Here is the conclusion of our sweet interview with Cowboy and Bets Davis, our marriage mentoring mentors:
You have mentored so many marriages. How did you both get involved in investing in other married couples?
Cowboy: It all began by accident. Years ago, my wife and another lady began teaching a marriage enrichment course. Soon they discovered they needed a man to add to their program. The lady dropped out and my wife and I became the team. For 40 years, we have been either counseling couples or teaching marriage enrichment classes.
Bets: Cowboy and I had attended a Marriage Encounter Weekend and knew that the Lord was calling us to become team leaders. The rest is history. When we married, we were so ignorant of God's blueprint for marriage. As we pursued studying how to make a good marriage better, our hearts were led to share it with other couples. Good marriages don't just happen....they take a lot of work!
Cowboy: My wife was smarter than I was because she knew if I began teaching marriage enrichment principles, I would have to live them out. Teaching and mentoring couples has become the most meaningful thing that we do in life.
Do you think marriage is valued in today's society? Why or why not?
Bets: Our culture is rapidly changing in so many ways. I believe that marriage is valued among most Christians, but not so in the world today. Living together before marriage is the way most people operate today. God intended for us to be fruitful and to multiply. However, we see that babies born out of wedlock is not only common, but acceptable. This definitely changes the way marriage is viewed today.
Cowboy: My law practice involves handling divorces and child custody cases. Today, young people have little regard for marriage. As Bets said, they begin living together and having sex before marriage. The number of children born outside of marriage is shocking to me, but not to our culture. This leads me to believe that marriage is not important to a large segment of our society. An understanding and commitment to Biblical principles is severely lacking in this generation. A culture without moral standards to guide their lives relegates them to seek satisfaction in the passion of the flesh, regardless of the consequences. If pregnancy does occur, the decision to have the baby of an abortion does not always consider the impact on their lives or the baby's.
What would you most like to share with a young couple considering marriage today?
Cowboy: Looking back over my life, the most significant thing that I would choose to do differently would be to grow closer to Jesus Christ earlier in my life. Unfortunately, I chose to "stiff-arm" God for many years. I was not interested in Bible Study until I was fifty years old!
Bets: Picture your relationship as a triangle, with God at the top. The closer you come to Him, the closer you are drawn to each other. If you both have a spiritual base, you must be committed and give allegiance to God and to a purpose outside and beyond yourselves. To make marriage work, we need God!
Cowboy: I want to scream out the message to young people that God is the answer. Romans 8:28 says "All things work together for good for those who love Jesus Christ." This applies when both partners in a marriage love the Lord. Their marriage will not fail!
Thanks so much to Cowboy and Bets for giving us this rich window into their personal lives. Kellie and I echo the satisfaction and fulfillment of helping other couples stay committed to and intentional about their marriages. We also share the firm belief that a marriage relationship built on a foundation of Christ will give that marriage strength which can potentially withstand any storm (Matthew 7:24-27). We are so grateful for the Davis' rich legacy to so many marriages (like ours) and we join them in celebrating fifty incredible years of marriage in August. Happy Anniversary!
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